Still the old me

Throughout my entire life, I’ve always viewed my old self as a completely different person than the current me. No matter what age I was, I’d look back on myself a couple years before and consider her to be both naive and inexperienced. Although it was hard to come to this conclusion, I recently realized something else: that girl from the past is still inside of me.

As a freshman, I wore clothes that current me wouldn’t be caught dead in. I styled my hair in unflattering ways. I wore blotchy makeup and posed awkwardly in photos. As I got older, I regarded my freshman self as cringe-worthy and preferred to delete all photos of that era. But, as I sit here and consider what made me into the senior that I am today — confident, hopeful and self-assured — I came to the conclusion that I would be none of those things if not for my embarrassing freshman year. That girl shaped the one that writes this today; she is the one that writes this today. We are not separate entities; we are one and the same. Everything I am now is possible because of the mistakes and decisions I made in the beginning of high school. 

Now, as a senior, I am so grateful for everything I did throughout high school. I’ve learned lessons that I will refer to for the rest of my life. I’ve grown into the woman I was always meant to be. I’ve discovered what I want out of life, and I’ve given myself the determination to achieve it. I no longer think of freshman-year Abby as unknowing or ignorant; now, I see her for what she is: an essential piece of the person I’m growing into. I have so many incredible plans for my future, and if I learned anything from my younger self, it’s to allow myself to grow and learn.